We're supposed to be getting married...

2014 was supposed to be one of the best years yet. We are planning a wedding for December. I can't say that it isn't going to happen. But, things that were going to happen are most definitely going to be different than originally planned.

This wedding wasn't going to just be about Brian and I joining our lives... it was about the three of us, me, him, and Todd. We've already been our own little family for awhile... this was just going to seal the deal. Todd was going to be the ring bearer. There were certain aspects of the ceremony we were going to incorporate him into. Most of all... I wanted a mother & son dance with him. This is the part that breaks my heart.

We haven't had anything as far as planning that has demanded our attention right this second so luckily we haven't really had to make a decision yet. It's still pretty far away. A lot can change. I get a lot of questions about whether or not we're still doing it, how is this going to affect our plans etc. To be honest... I hadn't thought about it until people started asking.

That day is going to be so different for us now. We've now gone through a really hard life challenge. Not one most couples go through before marriage or even early into a marriage. It's definitely eye opening and I can't imagine going through this with anyone else by my side.

As of right now, the only thing that would stop us from having it is if Todd wouldn't be able to be there. Regardless of what condition he's in, as long as he's there... I'll be okay. We will find a way to make everything else work and fall into place.